Overcoming #1 Obstacle to commitment

Do you know whats the most detrimental that decides the fate of a relationship? Its the difference between ending up getting the ring or getting dumped especially if you are starting  a relationship. This article looks at how detrimental that thinking can be to any relationship, but particularly to one just getting started.Biggest Obstacle to getting commitment from men

# 1 Rule : Establishing open, honest communication from the very beginning

Too many times, a woman may tell lies at the beginning of a relationship because she believes the truth will somehow cause her to be less desirable or completely unattractive to the man. The importance of establishing open, honest communication

It is even more critical when you are dealing with a prospective husband. I can’t stress enough on how critical it is for the man to be totally accepting of who you really are in order for the relationship to flourish.

When men sense that you are not putting forward the ‘Real You’, out comes all the excuses, it can take the form of ‘ I need my space’,’ We need to slow down’ , I’m just not ready to settle down yet‘, that’s when you start wondering what on earth you did wrong..

Lying about self can cause the relationship to be built on a faulty foundation

What does lying or not being honest do to your long term prospects?

Lying to someone early in a relationship is like building a house on a foundation of sand. The house may stand initially, but it’s only a matter of time before a slight breeze picks up and sends the thing crashing down.  It’s up to you lay a strong foundation for your relationship or sabotage it right from the word go.

One lie turns into another until a person can never go back

What it Means to You: It is extremely common for people to lie about various things on first dates and in young relationships. It is important to understand that the only reason people lie about something is because they fear the other person won’t like them for who they really are.

For example, women often lie about previous relationships. Women who do this feel that they must lie about their previous relationships because the person they are lying to might see who they really are by being truthful. Now who would want that? (Kidding!)

If you start a relationship based on lies, it’s only a matter of time before it will come crashing down. All lies are eventually found out and you’ll see that the ramifications of a lie are far worse than the ramifications of telling the truth the first time around.

What does smart women need to know: Do yourself a favor and start each and every potential relationship off with the “real” you. If there is something a person doesn’t like about you, maybe it’s not meant to be. The reality of the matter is that the “real” you will eventually come out. Don’t set your relationship up for failure from day one.

There is a bigger issue which comes into play when you are not honest, you lose something which you don’t want to lose in a relationship, and it’s called ‘Trust’. Once a person has lied and the other person is aware of the lie, it can be hard to ever believe the “liar” again, don’t you think?

Trust is necessary no matter what kind of relationship it is, and losing that trust can be devastating to future of a relationship.

The game plan

  • Take a bit of time and space to mull things over
  • Determine you may have contributed to lack of commitment from him
  • Sit down with him and have a chat. Be frank, supportive and as kind as you can, and listen to what he has to say.
  • Remember telling a lie may give you short term gains but long term success diminishes exponentially.
  • What are you willing to do to change it?
  • start taking COMMITTED ACTION!

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